How to Get A Mentor: It’s Not as Hard as You Think

One of the questions I get asked the most is, “How do I get a mentor?” And for good reason. Having a mentor (or more than one mentor) in your corner can make a huge difference to a growing career. 

They can be an invaluable resource of professional advice, give you feedback on your scripts, and - if you’re very lucky and the timing is right - recommend you for work.

So, back to the question everyone is asking, “How do I get one?” Below are three types of mentors to be on the lookout for, where to find them, and how to get them on your team:

Peer Mentors

Peer mentors are exactly that - your peers. Fellow writers, friends, writers group members, or even college classmates. Anyone who is roughly at the same point in their career as you are. I know what you’re thinking, “But how can someone who isn’t “ahead” of me help me get ahead?” Although it might not seem obvious at first, peer mentors can be invaluable. They will most likely understand your creative and career dilemmas because they are in the Hollywood trenches alongside you. They can be a sympathetic ear when you feel like your career isn’t moving forward, a cheerleader when you have a creative breakthrough, and share resources like tips on great screenwriting classes or writers groups. Also, some of your peer mentors might climb the career ladder faster than you do - which means you never know when they might help pull you up a few rungs.

Advisor Mentors

An advisor mentor is someone who has been in the industry for a few years or more. They have developed a great network, and are open to helping you. Finding these mentors can happen through “targeted outreach” through your colleagues, friends, and sometimes even your family. But, more often than not, meeting these types of mentors happens organically and takes time. Maybe you meet one at a friend’s birthday party, or at a WAG event and you share little more than a quick friendly chat. That quick chat might lead to a longer conversation the next time you run into them, which might turn into a one-on-one meeting months later. Finding mentors really is playing the “long game” so try to be patient. Also, if you do reach out to a potential advisor mentor directly, it’s important to do it the right way. Be respectful, mindful of their time, and ask about their experience in the industry (ask them to tell you their story, everyone likes to talk about their journey) - then ask for advice.

Guru Mentors

A guru mentor is the type of mentor most emerging writers dream about. They might be Showrunners, producers, executives, or established screenwriters with a strong track record and a deep wealth of contacts. That being said, they also usually have little time to spare - which makes them a bit illusive to find, but not impossible. Out of all the types of mentors in Hollywood these relationships can take years to develop. However, since guru mentors truly do have the power to change your career, they are worth investing in.  A guru mentor might be someone who was your boss at one time, or who you were introduced to and had an informational meeting with, or you met through a mentorship program. Or in some truly unexpected way, like getting stuck in an elevator together (I actually know someone this happened to).

When I was an executive, I met one of the top CAA agents, who became my guru mentor. I met him when I was at CBS and he mentioned that he loved junk food. So the next week, I sent him $100 dollars worth of candy bars in a fabulous basket. He was amused and impressed and invited me to lunch. We hit it off. I never asked him for anything until I was up for a job at Amblin. He had a relationship with Kathleen Kennedy and he put in a good word for me. I know that helped me get that interview, which led to my job. That was the only favor I ever asked him for, but we stayed friends (well, mentee-mentor) for years and he always kept a look out for me.

So, how do you ask someone to be your mentor?

The answer is: You don’t. Think of it from their perspective, if you were a very busy person in a mentorship position would you want a mentee that you barely know? A good mentor-mentee relationship takes time and evolves naturally. If you are appreciative, respectful, have the right attitude and are frankly an amazing writer - once they get to know you, if they like you, and are impressed with your work, and your work ethic, they’ll want to help you. But it’s a process that can take years and usually pays off when you least expect it. 

If you want to learn more about how to land a Hollywood mentor check out my book Hollywood Game Plan on Amazon or at Michael Wiese Productions (MWP) and my Hollywood Bootcamp for more insider tips.

What are your best practices for finding and fostering a mentor relationship? Let me know @CaroleKirsch!